Greatest How-To Ever…At Least In Japan

(Edit 11/01/2009: Further accusation of photoshopping. I’m way too lazy to do that… Here’s proof. Go here: http://www.kuro-hitsuji.com/en/contents.html and click on “Best Way to Enjoy” to see it in “normal” English. Now, go here: http://www.kuro-hitsuji.com/jp/contents.html and click on the same location – middle row, middle link – and you’ll see the same images as I posted here. I only wish my photoshopping skills were this good…)

(Edit 10/30/2009: Due to some reactions to this, I decided to add more info. This is in the Lazona Kawasaki shopping mall attached to Kawasaki Station just outside of Tokyo at a restaurant named “KuraKuro Hitsuji” or “Black Sheep”. No, it is not meant to be offensive. No, it’s not photoshopped… Really…)

Wasn’t planning on a post today but I ran into this after lunch today and I just had to share. It’s too damn…bizzare not to.

As I was leaving an okonomiyaki shop, next door was what we here in Japan call, a Genghiskhan restaurant. Yup. The same name as the general with the golden horde that took over most of Asia from mongolia. But this is one of those “cook your own meat” place but modeled after the saying that his men used to cook mutton on top of their shields. So you get a dome of oiled steel to cook your meat on. Really really tasty stuff.

But recently the restaurant put up a gigantic poster that covers their entire front window that shows how to cook the meat in Japanese and English. Now…the Japanese is standard normal every day Japanese. But the English… Oh the English. I have to guess that they did this on purpose. And whoever did this did a pretty good job with just one weird part. You have to see this.

Click on the link to see the closeups!!

It starts off with an intro…

Now you gotta get the grill hot!

Start cooking the meat.

But don’t get distracted!!

Gotta get some veggies too.

And just like Chinese food…you just start getting a craving again

…so…awesome!!

show hide 58 comments

Kirk Marmol - April 16, 2012 - 9:38 pm

Great description!! I’m extremely a novice to this type of nevertheless truly like the activity.

Babette Hause - March 7, 2012 - 10:50 am

Thank you for all of your time & work. As a Newbie, I am always searching online for articles that can be of assistance to me.

Thera - July 28, 2009 - 7:37 pm

Is this a fakepost? You posted a link to the real translation, not these fake “translations”. They’re clearly not the same. If it is a fakepost, then you got me. Kudos.

anti-fanty - July 6, 2009 - 4:42 pm

Fanty’s posts are clearly photoshopped.

fanty - January 29, 2009 - 10:32 am

forgot to add that this how-to is just hilarious.

fanty - January 29, 2009 - 10:31 am

the “photoshopped” thing is just a meme…

AbuMaia - December 12, 2008 - 4:17 am

#38, Dexter… you might want to recheck your math.

sian - December 1, 2008 - 8:33 am

Suddenly everyone is behaving like some authority on photoshop when they don’t even have a decent portfolio. Grow up people… visit the world sometimes, thats how engrish.com started.

Maybe i should go around claiming the comments posted by other people as impostors.. that would be fun.

Larry Edelstein - November 24, 2008 - 6:56 pm

This is freaking awesome funny. And the comments by “Jerry Wallace” are also very funny. Stay alert for the humor, people.

Anon - November 17, 2008 - 1:48 am

I just want to know how the hell you edited in 2009!!!

“(Edit 11/01/2009: Further accusation of photoshopping. I’m way too lazy to do that… Here’s proof. Go here: http://www.kuro-hitsuji.com/en/contents.html and click on “Best Way to Enjoy” to see it in “normal” English. Now, go here: http://www.kuro-hitsuji.com/jp/contents.html and click on the same location – middle row, middle link – and you’ll see the same images as I posted here. I only wish my photoshopping skills were this good…)”

Tell me the secret of time travel!!

Lav - November 14, 2008 - 7:20 pm

Honestly, people just can’t appreciate anything these days. It’s posted for humor so we can all get a good laugh, and he even backed it up with valid proof and everyone is running left and right accusing him of photoshopping images.

Even if he did make that website up all the more power to him to be able to do so just to pull a prank. -.-;;

And if you don’t find it funny or think it’s shopped just don’t post a comment, it’s not appreciated.

Phil E. Drifter - November 14, 2008 - 3:04 am

Then you can call me a ‘troll’ too, ‘guy,’ if that IS your real name, because this is totally photoshopped; I would know, I’ve seen a few photoshopped images in my day.

Guy - November 12, 2008 - 6:45 am

Just so you people are aware, Jerry is a troll, claiming something is photoshopped it troll bait, he knows it’s not photoshopped, it’s a meme born from the butthole of the internet known as 4chan.

alex van den berg - November 11, 2008 - 10:50 pm

worst thing i have ever read

hahaha - November 6, 2008 - 4:07 am

btw not-chadd sounds like a loser, so ignore him.

hahaha - November 6, 2008 - 4:06 am

its def not photo shopped. Really hilarious. Esp the hot girl

Scott - November 5, 2008 - 3:16 pm

Did they use the Tha Shizzolator to translate it?

DWax - November 3, 2008 - 6:13 pm

Jerry Wallace,

I am very suspicious of your accusations. A google search for Marcus Gulley and photoshop turns up no valid results except for this very page. I don’t know if Marcus Gulley even exists. I looked on Adobe.com and there is no mention of Marcus Gulley there either. Also, the numbers adding up to 21 indicate nothing except that a week is seven days long and 1+2+3+4+5+6+7=21. And it would be very hard to photoshop a large picture with all of the panels to look exactly the same as individual panels from a different point of view and most likely different focal lengths judging by the distortion in the upper picture from a wide angle view. I also seriously doubt that anyone would create a website just to back up the validity of some pictures on a blog. These things cost money.

Respectfully,
Dexter

CK - November 3, 2008 - 11:21 am

Not to alarm anyone but whether this is genuine or not – the original artwork will have probably been done in photoshop or something similar anyway – so what’s your point!?

not-chad - November 3, 2008 - 11:01 am

Not sure whether it’s good or bad – ah, I’m gonna go with bad – that most of you folks are so easily amused. Did anyone really laugh aloud at this? Some foreigner put up some fake text on an ad, or someone -shopped it. Real or fake, it’s not funny. Sorry. As you should be for WASTING MY TIME.

Carter - November 2, 2008 - 10:41 pm

Very nice. This has got to be the best proof that cross culture situs are not only educational, but stupidly funny.

Jerry Wallace - November 2, 2008 - 10:01 am

I refuse to be ignored. I was adopted, I demand attention from strangers.

J-Dubbz

R - November 1, 2008 - 10:28 pm

Admin, who cares what people say? There will always be a percentage of people that will never believe anything. See faked lunar landing. Just ignore them.

Jerry Wallace - November 1, 2008 - 9:22 pm

Hello Honorable Admin Poster Sir. (or sir-ess)

I’ve examined the links that you’ve posted and I’m sorry to say that my doppler radar of fraudulent posting went off wildly. It appears that you are very talented in covering your tracks, as well as very dedicated. Never before have I seen a website whose sole purpose was to back up the validity of a picture, which has obviously been tampered with, until now.

I admire your persistence, but the integrity of this post was compromised as soon as the number 21 made it’s appearance to me. Yes, I added the numbers from the calendar frame, and I’m well aware of the significance that the number 21 represents.

You may or may not be familiar with Marcus Gulley, one of the brains behind Adobe Photoshop, so let me fill you in. Marcus was among the very first to harness the true power of Photoshop and became so good at photo manipulation that he was hired to rework many historical photos (which shall remain unnamed). Long story short, he’s well known for leaving clues and easter eggs in his work and the number 21 is one of them.

Jerry Wallace triumphs again.

admin - November 1, 2008 - 9:00 pm

Hi Jerry Wallace. Too bad you didn’t use a valid e-mail address before accusing me of faking something. I wag my finger of disapproval at your comment!! (-_-)

See my new edit at the top for further proof of the validity of this insanely funny poster. (^_^)

Jerry Wallace - November 1, 2008 - 8:47 pm

This has obviously been photoshopped, look at all of those pixels around the letters. Never mind compression or resolution, it’s the tell-tale sign of photoshopism. Since it isn’t genuinely outrageous, it isn’t funny.

I wag my finger of disapproval at this post.

I am Jerry Wallace.

Jenny, Bloggess - November 1, 2008 - 9:36 am

Awesomeness.

finfan - November 1, 2008 - 8:02 am

Sounds like they went to the Snoop Dog school of translation!
That is hilarious STUFF!!
STRAIGHT UP, FO REAL

Arjan - November 1, 2008 - 3:32 am

that’s some wicked cooking fo sho!

belle - October 31, 2008 - 5:01 pm

i hate all you idiots that say everything is photoshopped its really funny did you not laugh???

Steve - October 31, 2008 - 11:18 am

Reminds me of G-Fresh from the Trey Parker/Matt Stone movie “Orgazmo.”

Mark - October 31, 2008 - 9:00 am

I’ll bet they hired a black American sailor from Yokosuka to do the translation.

piklz - October 31, 2008 - 4:40 am

it’s written like that on they’re jap language page but on the english page you can read it in proper english if your offended by the Ali-G translation then click the usa flag instead! most funny though they should keep it like that!

Dennis - October 30, 2008 - 10:13 pm

most shopped thing i’ve ever seen.

Ryan G - October 30, 2008 - 4:58 pm

That’s mental.

nad - October 30, 2008 - 11:08 am

LOL! That #3 poster looks like a shampoo ad.

Natovr - October 30, 2008 - 5:10 am

Hahaha, I want to try that out, aiight! :D

Gerald Weber - October 29, 2008 - 8:58 pm

ha ha. ROFL. That’s great!

admin - October 29, 2008 - 6:36 pm

Ahh…tecrane…if only it were. But I’m too lazy to do all this work in Photoshop…

It’s from a store in Lazona shopping mall attached to Kawasaki Station called “Kuro Hitsuji” or “Black Sheep”.

http://www.kuro-hitsuji.com/

tecrane - October 29, 2008 - 6:14 pm

photoshopped

Mr. Briggs - October 29, 2008 - 3:56 pm

Um, wow.

Who taught him that dialect?

some - October 29, 2008 - 1:42 pm

this is one of the most hilarious things i have ever seen, thanks

adodger - October 29, 2008 - 1:14 pm

Righteous!

robataka - October 25, 2008 - 9:36 am

That is truly funny.

Zach - October 22, 2008 - 9:59 pm

I guess P-Diddy’s been doing some translation on the side. Maybe he should give Claudia Gutierrez a call for some freelance work???….

Z

Aimee - October 22, 2008 - 10:45 am

I’m totally going to Japan! Dat Genghiskhan Mutton will be will be on my mind!

Linda - October 21, 2008 - 9:49 pm

Dude, is that Mark Walberg?!

Kathie - October 21, 2008 - 12:41 pm

Dat made my day!

Vanessa - October 21, 2008 - 11:05 am

Dat be some funny sh*t, yo!

Maria - October 21, 2008 - 8:40 am

hilarious! if it wasn’t posted by you i wouldn’t believe it.

wtfplusplus.com - November 5, 2008 - 12:43 am

Engrish-bonics Instruction Manual…

Two great tastes that taste great together…

[...] Greatest How To Ever At Least In Japan – This is just hysterical. I love the thought of the person actually going through the translation and how cool he must think he is. Priceless! [...]

[...] but made me laugh so here you go..read more about this poster here straight up [...]

Genghiskhan « PHEED - October 29, 2008 - 4:20 pm

[...] Stolen from Posted by pheed Filed in Link [...]

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